Meredith Holley's Reviews > The Help

The Help by Kathryn Stockett
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bookshelves: abandoned, reviewed, disturbing, punching-tour

I have this terrible, dreary feeling in my diaphragm area this morning, and I’m not positive what it’s about, but I blame some of it on this book, which I am not going to finish. I have a friend who is mad at me right now for liking stupid stuff, but the thing is that I do like stupid stuff sometimes, and I think it would be really boring to only like smart things. What I don’t like is when smart (or even middle-brained) writers take an important topic and make it petty through guessing about what they don’t know. I can list you any number of these writers who would be fine if they weren't reaching into topics about which they have no personal experience (incidentally, all writers I'm pretty sure my angry friend loves. For example, The Lovely Bones, The Kite Runner, Water for Elephants, Memoirs of a Geisha, etc.). These are the books for which I have no patience, topics that maybe someone with more imagination or self-awareness could have written about compassionately, without exploiting the victimization of the characters. They’re books that hide lazy writing behind a topic you can’t criticize. The Help is one of these.

You’ve got this narrative telephone game in this book. The telephone game is pretty fun sometimes, and it is really beautiful in monster stories like Frankenstein and Wuthering Heights because what they are telling me is not intended as trustworthy or earnest. All of the seriousness in monster stories is an impression or an emotion reflected back through the layers of narrative. I don’t feel that way about the topic of The Help, though. In this book, a white woman writes from the point of view of a black woman during the Civil Rights movement, who overhears the conversations of white women. It's an important topic, and I don't want to hear it through untrustworthy narrators.

So, I can basically get on board with the dialect of the black maids, but what throws me off as a reader is when the black maid is quoting the white women and they’re all speaking perfect English without a trace of an accent. It becomes particularly weird when one of the black maids starts to comment on the extreme accent of one of the white women, Celia Foote, whose written dialogue continues to be impeccable. Who is this narrator? Why does she choose not to speak proper English if she can speak it? Why does she choose to give proper English to someone else who she has told me doesn't speak it? Also, usually the layers of narration in a telephone-game book are only within the book. In this case, it’s the author’s voice stabbing through the story. I am convinced it is her whose brain hears the white woman speaking TV English, and the black women speaking in dialect. It gives away the game.

Even the quotes from the movie have an example of this. A conversation between her and Minnie goes like this:

Celia Foote: They don't like me because of what they think I did.
Minny Jackson: They don't like you 'cause they think you white trash.

Celia speaks in a proper sentence, but Minny misses the "are" in the second part of the sentence. Celia says "because," but Minny says "'cause." If the reader were supposed to understand that Celia does not speak in dialect, that would make sense, but since it specifically states that she does, it doesn't make sense.

To attempt to be clear, I didn't have a problem that the book was in dialect. I had a problem that the book said, "This white woman speaks in an extreme dialect," and then wrote the woman's dialog not in dialect. Aerin points out in message 111 that I am talking about eye dialect, which is about spelling, not pronunciation, as in the example above. Everyone, in real life, speaks in some form of non-standard English. Though I have seen some really beautiful uses of eye dialect, as Aerin points out, writers typically use it to show subservience of characters or that they are uneducated, which often has racist overtones. If it troubles you that I'm saying this, and you would like to comment on this thread, you may want to read other comments because it is likely someone has already said what you are going to say.

I’m not finishing this one, and it’s not because I think people shouldn’t like it, but rather because I’m almost 100 pages in and I can see the end, and it’s failed to engage me. When a few IRL friends have asked what I thought of the book and I said I didn't care for it, they have told me that I am taking it too seriously, that it is just a silly, fluff book, not a serious study of Civil Rights. Again, I don’t have a problem with stupid books, but when it’s a stupid book disguised as an Important Work of Cultural History, all I want to do the whole time is tear its mask off. And a book about Civil Rights is always important cultural history to me. Anyway, the book becomes unpleasant; I become unpleasant; it’s bad news. If you loved this book, though, (or, really, even if you hated it) I would recommend Coming of Age in Mississippi. I think that book is one of the more important records of American history. Plus, it’s beautifully written, inspirational, and shocking. It's been years since I read it, so I might be giving it an undeserved halo, but I can’t say enough good things about it.

INDEX OF PROBLEMS WITH THIS REVIEW

"You should finish the book before you talk about it": comment 150 (second paragraph); comments 198 and 199.

“Stockett did experience the Civil Rights Era”: comment 154; comment 343.

“The author of The Lovely Bones was raped”: comment 190.

“The author of The Kite Runner is from Afghanistan”: comment 560.

"Memoirs of a Geisha is accurate and not comparable to The Help": comment 574.

“Don’t be so critical!”: comment 475.

“Have you written a bestseller?”: comment 515.

“Fiction doesn’t have to be a history lesson”: comments 157 through 162.

“Having grown up in the South during this era and having had a maid, I could relate to the emotional nuances of this book”: comments 222 and 223.

"Minny and Aibileen are relatable": comment 626

“You are trying to silence authors”: comment 317 and comments 306 through 316.

“Why do you want to read a Civil Rights book about racism and hatred? I would prefer one about friendship and working together”: comment 464.

“Why are there so many votes for such a half-assed review?”: comment 534.

“Authors can write outside of their personal experiences”: comments 569 through 587.
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Reading Progress

April 30, 2010 – Shelved
July 20, 2010 – Started Reading
July 24, 2010 –
page 63
13.58% "This feels really Ya Ya Sisterhood to me. I don't know if I should give up or not."
July 25, 2010 –
page 85
18.32% "Not for me."
July 25, 2010 – Finished Reading
August 1, 2010 – Shelved as: reviewed
May 18, 2011 – Shelved as: disturbing
May 18, 2011 – Shelved as: punching-tour
February 19, 2016 – Shelved as: abandoned

Comments Showing 601-650 of 929 (929 new)


message 601: by Meredith (last edited Jan 06, 2013 11:40AM) (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Why are they not allowed to call themselves that? Is it stigmatized?


message 602: by Jason (new) - rated it 4 stars

Jason Dave Matthews is African American by definition, isn't he? But it's still sort of misleading to identify him as such because that label has come to mean 'black', hasn't it?

Also, does hating Dave Matthews make me racist? Because I hate Dave Matthews.


Spider the Doof Warrior He is a bit annoying. I just like that one song though


message 604: by Jessica (new)

Jessica My grandmother uses the words "colored" and "Negro". But she's 82.

Also, she doesn't speak English, so actually, she uses the words "colorado" and "Negro" (spelled the same, pronounced differently).

She has nothing against black people, those are just the words she uses.

How she feels about Dominicans, on the other hand.....


Spider the Doof Warrior My grandmother hated west Indians

This did not make sense to me.


message 606: by Meredith (last edited Jan 06, 2013 11:49AM) (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Oh, I'm dumb and didn't read non-black above. But, still, it kind of makes sense for them to just use it, I think.

Also, this reminds me of the story that I told somewhere, but I forget where, about my ninth-grade class in Ukraine. My favorite student, Artyom, who was really smart, and badass, and my birthday twin, used to ask me these questions that he intended to be very incendiary. One day, he was like, "Miss Holley, how do you feel about the African Americans?"

I said, "Well . . . the same way I feel about anybody else. There are nice African Americans and mean ones."

"Oh," he responded. "We do not have any African Americans in Lozovaya. There are a few, I think, in Kharkov, but Lozovaya is a small town."

"Do you mean African Ukrainians?" I asked. And suddenly all the students turned their heads to me with their eyes wide. It was like you could see their gears turning. Not to be meta-racist, but Ukrainians tend to be very racist.

When I was leaving my town, months later, the kids all came to the train station to help me with my stuff and say goodbye, and Artyom said, "I hope you see many African Ukrainians in Kyiv," he said. Awww.


message 607: by Jason (new) - rated it 4 stars

Jason My wife works with a black nurse who refers to her skin color as 'chocolate.' If a white person were to refer to a black person as 'chocolate' I feel like that would be really weird, but I dunno...I guess that's how she identifies herself. Does that make me 'vanilla', though?


message 608: by Jessica (new)

Jessica Synesthesia wrote: "My grandmother hated west Indians

This did not make sense to me."


I'm going to show my ignorance here, but I never could figure out who west indians are or what they look like.


message 609: by Jessica (new)

Jessica Jessica wrote: "Synesthesia wrote: "My grandmother hated west Indians

This did not make sense to me."

I'm going to show my ignorance here, but I never could figure out who west indians are or what they look like."


Nevermind. Just googled it. Duh.


message 610: by Cory (last edited Jan 06, 2013 12:14PM) (new) - rated it 2 stars

Cory West Indians are basically blacks who live in the Caribbean. The Bahamas, Haiti, Trinidad and Tobago, Jamaica, etc...


message 611: by Cory (new) - rated it 2 stars

Cory Jason wrote: "My wife works with a black nurse who refers to her skin color as 'chocolate.' If a white person were to refer to a black person as 'chocolate' I feel like that would be really weird, but I dunno......"

If you want to be vanilla, you can be vanilla. The correct term, however, is white chocolate.


message 612: by Jessica (new)

Jessica Cory wrote: "The correct term, however, is white chocolate, ..."

or Fuzzy Navel?


message 613: by Cory (new) - rated it 2 stars

Cory Jessica wrote: "Cory wrote: "The correct term, however, is white chocolate, ..."

or Fuzzy Navel?"


... odd. I've never heard that one before. Isn't that kind of yellow, though?


message 614: by Jessica (new)

Jessica I just made it up. For the peach ingredient.


message 615: by Mir (new)

Mir Does that make me 'vanilla', though?

Refer that one to your wife, Jason. Or someone else who feels comfortable licking you.

Seriously, I always find comparisons of people's skin, body parts, etc to foodstuffs kind of disturbing. Like many Geddes photographs. People Are Not For Eating! Are they?


message 616: by Katie (new) - rated it 1 star

Katie Comfort I agree with Sparrow. Good for you for not finishing it. I'm disappointed that I did.


message 617: by Heidi (new) - rated it 5 stars

Heidi Scott I really enjoyed reading the book. I Couldn't bring myself to read your review past the first couple of sentences.


message 618: by Tala (new) - rated it 4 stars

Tala I stumbled upon this review completely accidentally, after my phone froze and I was tapping everywhere on the app to get it to work again. I don't generally comment on anything but after reading part of your tired review, I felt compelled to do so. I am obviously late to the game on reading and reviewing The Help and admittedly have not yet finished it myself; however, my comment is less about the book and more about your tired, redundant, rambling review. It really rubs me the wrong way when someone like yourself criticizes writing style and grammar. To be clear, I mean someone who wouldn't know proper grammar if it smacked them in the face. in your review, you said that the author left out the "is" in the second part of a statement by Minny. Well, since we are being grammatically correct, she left out the "are". In that same paragraph, you said "if the reader were supposed..." which should either read "if the readers were..." or "if the reader was..." And, for God's sake, learn the proper use of a comma. You got it right roughly 50% of the time.

All that aside, I can't imagine what compelled you to write a review on a book you got 19% of the way through. Try that at a publishing company or as a book reviewer for any magazine or newspaper and you would find yourself without a job. Your "review" half-assed and unreliable at best. And your overuse of the word "stupid" makes you look, well, stupid.

I'm off to finish the book now.


message 619: by Mir (new)

Mir tommie wrote: "huh. even at a publishing company you dont have to read all of a book to know whether it's something you will like or not. why would that be any different here? "

Oh man, imagine if editors had to read all of every manuscript submitted. That would be a shit job.


message 620: by [deleted user] (new)

That's right. Was would be an overcorrection in that case.


message 621: by [deleted user] (new)

Also, Sparrow is not nitpicking grammar when she mentions Minny dropping the is, she's talking about the use of dialect.


message 622: by Meredith (last edited Mar 02, 2013 10:29AM) (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Tala wrote: "I stumbled upon this review completely accidentally, after my phone froze and I was tapping everywhere on the app to get it to work again. I don't generally comment on anything but after reading pa..."

haha, I totally hate this review, too. Fair. And good point about the "are."

"Were" is correct, though. As far as I understand, it is the conditional. That's the thing I made you all look up and teach me a couple of years ago.


message 623: by Meredith (new) - added it

Meredith Holley And I'm very devastated to be fired from my free internet blogging. How will I pay my mortgage?


message 624: by Meredith (last edited Mar 02, 2013 10:38AM) (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Also, I would be interested to hear what comma rule I'm using wrong. I know that I do put a comma after a dependent clause where it starts a sentence, and I believe that is optional where it is four words or less. I was marked down for leaving the comma out, though, in a recent writing class, so I always do it now, even where it's optional.


message 625: by Meredith (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Thank you!


message 626: by Rafael (new) - rated it 5 stars

Rafael Personally, I loved this book. Loved every bit of it in my unblissful ignorance. Even so, I found your review delightful. Thank you for it. I thank you for pointing out all of the discrepancies and things you didn't like as you've added to my perspective. I have the impression, that even I, having read the whole 500 pages of this book, gave it less thought than you, reading a hundred of them.


message 627: by Meredith (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Thank you! That's very kind of you to say.


message 628: by Greg (new)

Greg "I can list you any number of these writers who would be fine if they weren't reaching into topics about which they have no personal experience..."

I can't blame you for not finishing a book you don't enjoy. But to write a review of a book that you admit you read only 100 pages of...when, in the author's notes at the end, she talks of growing up in Jackson, MS, with an African-American maid, essentially her "Constantine, well it rather refutes your review, and you just come across as condescending.


message 629: by Mir (last edited Mar 08, 2013 11:22AM) (new)

Mir Greg wrote: "I can't blame you for not finishing a book you don't enjoy. But to write a review of a book that you admit you read only 100 pages of...when, in the author's notes at the end, she talks of growing up in Jackson, MS, with an African-American maid, essentially her "Constantine, well it rather refutes your review, and you just come across as condescending. "

Comment index ref #s:

comment 150 (second paragraph); comments 198 and 199.
154; comment 343.


message 630: by Jason (new) - rated it 4 stars

Jason <giggle>


message 631: by Sarah (new) - rated it 4 stars

Sarah You can't blame a person for not reading 664 comments, though. I was mildly interested when I saw this pop up on my feed again, but lost interest when I saw the number of comments. Who's got the time?


message 632: by Jason (new) - rated it 4 stars

Jason Sarah wrote: "You can't blame a person for not reading 664 comments, though. I was mildly interested when I saw this pop up on my feed again, but lost interest when I saw the number of comments. Who's got the time?"

Haha, which is why she put an "index of complaints" about her review, directing incoming grievances to their respective solutions. She's like a party line operator.


message 633: by Meredith (new) - added it

Meredith Holley I like to streamline the complaint process.


message 634: by Gabby (new) - rated it 1 star

Gabby I really liked your review, even though the whole dialect discussion was relevant, but for me not the most important flaw in the book. What you nailed perfectly was how this book trivializes the entire black experience in the South. To reduce that issue to a scatological joke is nothing short of criminal to me. I hated the book and I hated the movie. it insults the intelligence of people of any color. If that means I "took it too seriously" , then why was it marketed as a book about the Southern Black experience? I did finish the book - I have this inane rule that I finish the books I start. That rule needs some rethinking.


message 635: by Meredith (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Agreed. It's not a hilarious topic, no matter how stupid you make the characters. This one is definitely a good illustration of why it's a great idea to put some books down. I haven't regretted it for a second.


message 636: by Sarah (new) - rated it 3 stars

Sarah I would just like to say that I appreciate your honest and well-written review of this book. I agree with Gabby that "this book trivializes the entire black experience in the South." Yes, It was a nice book with a nice story and nice thoughts about nice people. Frankly, when I read it, I did enjoy it. But I also read it before I had a more thorough understanding of how harmful books like The Help can be. Even within a context that supposedly uplifts black people, it demeans them. It should not be taken seriously at all and should not be considered an even remotely clear illustration of life for black people during the civil rights movement.


message 637: by Elle! (new) - rated it 1 star

Elle! I personally enjoyed your "controversial" review. I agree with you. People are trying to make this bubble , brush over a new representation of history. Hence the bestseller status. I am a fan of your reviews.


message 638: by Meredith (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Thanks!


message 639: by Nicole (new) - rated it 4 stars

Nicole Feeling rather late to the party and impressed to see that you're still interacting with commenters two years after the original review! To be honest, I didn't notice the things that stood as problems for you. My guess is that it's because I'm reading from an Australian perspective where racial tensions are a whole different kettle of fish. I'm wondering if it has become a best seller because so many people are reading from a point similar to myself, which is an inability to tell if it is authentic or not. It would never have occurred to me to consider the accent of the white characters. I probably read their voices with an Australian capital city accent.

All in all, I really enjoyed the book. I felt like I could feel the heat and humidity, and could, maybe not relate to, but certainly understand the way Miss Elizabeth had an almost desperate need to be accepted. I enjoyed Miss HIlly's vindictive mother. If we're grading on an ability to make me imagine myself within the story, The Help is a winner. All the same, I don't think it's ever going to be regarded as classic literature.

I'm interested in your response to The Kiterunner, too. The part that you felt was exploitive, to me represented a demonstration that the main character lacked empathy and compassion. I guess if exploitation is based on using a character to demonstrate something about the main character, then it certainly meets the criteria. But I wonder how else you can demonstrate character traits in your main character without having them respond to something that the author does to another?

Anyway, thanks for your thoughts. They've got me thinking further :)


message 640: by Gav451 (new) - rated it 4 stars

Gav451 While I disagree with much of what you say I like the fact you said it well and in detail. Thoroughly enjoyable review because at least you have an opinion.


message 641: by Gav451 (new) - rated it 4 stars

Gav451 While I disagree with much of what you say I like the fact you said it well and in detail. Thoroughly enjoyable review because at least you have an opinion.


message 642: by Meredith (last edited Jun 09, 2013 09:21AM) (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Thanks, you guys!

Nicole, sorry I forgot to respond earlier. I read your comment at work, and then I forgot to go back to it when I got home. I think I would say that the problem I have with the circumstances in the Kiterunner and here are not so much because of the reactions of the main characters as they are about the perspective of the victim. I think it is fair to write a tragic circumstance that happens to a secondary character, and I think it is fair to write it in such a way as to bring out character traits of the main character.

The problem I have is when the secondary-character/victim is also more concerned with the main character's reaction than their own victimization. That just rings false to me and requires more explanation in the narrative, I think. Like, either the victim is selling something in pretending to not care about his/her own victimization or the victim is seriously mentally ill, and either way, under those circumstances, the interesting thing happening there is not the main character's reaction. The interesting thing becomes the victim selling something or the victim's mental illness in being so concerned with the boring main character.

In those cases, I think the victim's entire perspective has been exploited to the service of the main character's perspective. But, I also think that in the Kiterunner, and here, it is because of bad writing, not because of any kind of plan on the part of the author. I think it's easy enough to imagine a secondary character's self-possessed perspective and the anger or bitterness or pity the secondary characters would feel for the main characters, but in order to do that, to give a more dignified voice to the secondary characters, the authors might have to step a little more out of their own culture and raising.

At the same time, though, I'm thinking about the maids in The Help when I'm talking about secondary characters, and the book is actually from their perspective. So, I think that is a clear illustration of the problem - the maids' voices are hijacked here to tell a story, not about themselves, but about this silly white girl. That, to me, especially when the maids allow the book to become a hot-issue story, is exploitative.


message 643: by Romancefanta (new)

Romancefanta Aw, I wrote a really long reply to this but accidentally hit the back button and it was lost, lol. Anyway the gist of it is that I agree with your views, and people should absolutely read 'Coming of Age in Mississippi' which is a favorite of mine. I've read my copy so many times that it has fallen apart. If you want to read about a real black woman and an example of a true black experience then that is a great book. I think I will buy another copy.


message 644: by Meredith (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Nice! It's such a great book!


Adam You're an idiot, plain and simple.


message 646: by Meredith (new) - added it

Meredith Holley Fuck you, clown.


message 647: by Eh?Eh! (last edited Jul 31, 2013 08:42AM) (new) - added it

Eh?Eh! Mackinnon wrote: "You're an idiot, plain and simple."

She gave her opinion. I find your opinion even more idiotic. She gave explanation and defended her position. You did not. You could do better by writing a stronger review of your own. Your current one isn't all that helpful, either in encouraging a stranger to read the book or dissuading observers of your outburst here of your mental incapacity.


message 648: by Ademption (new)

Ademption Sparrow wrote: "Fuck you, clown."

Best comment in my feed today. Sparrow, you're hilarious.


message 649: by Jason (last edited Jul 31, 2013 10:47AM) (new) - rated it 4 stars

Jason Ademption wrote: "Best comment in my feed today."

I agree.


message 650: by Ademption (last edited Jul 31, 2013 12:13PM) (new)

Ademption Mackinnon wrote: "You're an idiot, plain and simple."


I hope no one flags his comment, since the comeback is so concise.

[edit: added his comment]


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